Hope you have all recovered from my verbal diatribe yesterday...if you think I was talking about you, then I'm not-and please don't avoid posting your 'struggles' because of anyone. Like I said before, if you struggle then you must be putting in effort to begin with, and EVERYONE struggles!
Sadly, I think those that I was trying to talk to would never imagine I was talking about them, because they are probably content with their decisions-if not they would have already changed something, right?
I guess that is the logical path-see a problem, change something to fix it. But food addiction is far from logical for sure, and I am not remiss to admit it. Case in point-cookie dough. Yeah, not cookies, cookie dough. My Achilles Heel.
But I realized that for me, every other time I had dieted, lost weight, then regained it, that my heart AND mind was not in it. This time was different for several reasons that I have talked about before-the switch was flipped. I went from 'wanting' to lose weight, albeit REALLY BAD, to needing to lose weight if I was ever going to be happy and have a chance at real living and a LONG life.
Therefore, yesterday prior to my own revelation about the switch, I 'assumed' (ass+u+me), that if someone was serious enough to start a BLOG and get into the weight loss blogosphere with full force, then that person HAD to have their heart and mind into it, too, right? They wanted and needed to lose weight...RIGHT? Seems like ALOT of energy to just go through the motions...BUT-
Sometimes it is not all about A+B=C I guess, as I didn't take into account the 'attention seeker'. Someone who maybe was yearning for friendship, attention, a conversation, so that when they found the 'group therapy' in the weight loss blogosphere, they forgot their true motive? Or maybe found what they really wanted-a few pals, and never pursued the WL for real-mind and heart? I love my bloggy friends, but would never assume to lead them on with my own false intentions. Weight loss is too tough, too important for us all, to bullshit about...
Regardless of the state of your 'switch', I wish success for everyone, and I wish commitment for everyone-cause we all need some every once in a while. There is no joy or advantage for me if someone fails.
So to this post's true topic...many have discussed having to be selfish, put yourself first, in order to really succeed in weight loss.
But being a Mom is selfless. Now I am not at the point where I want to have a kid, feel ready either... However, and I'm not sure if this has happened to anyone, how did you get out of the selfish mindset and realize that with pregnancy weight gain is imminent for the health of the child?
I fear that once I reach my goal, then I am never going to want a kid, because I fear putting the weight back on-for any reason... I know adoption is an option, and may be my only option, but let's set that aside for a second and look at the heart of the issue...
Trust me, I know how horrible it sounds, but after working so hard to get to a weight that I won't have been for 20 years, how do I justify doing something that I know will set me back and make this hell necessary to re-live? Not that stabilization and maintenance are a walk in the park-but you know what I mean...
I know many of you out there fear the regain-not just fear but FEAR. Terrified. Will the want for a kid ever trump my fear of being overweight again? Anyone have insight on this? Ideas?