Polar Bear

Polar Bear
My Boy

Thursday, September 30, 2010

Fried Frito Pie

That is the newest 'deep fried' item to make it's grand entrance to the Texas State Fair this year.  

Last year was the fried butter-which is now resting comfortably on Oprah's thighs...

There is also fried Coke-which is basically fried shit stuck together, with some Coke in the batter, then they give you Coke for dipping sauce.  Sounds gag-alicious.

Check out these other Michelin Star delicacies...

Typically DH and I go to my weigh-in Saturday morning, then hit Sam's club for cases of bottled water (yes we recycle), and Milkbones (not for me but very low in fat I understand).  Then maybe off to the Farmer's Market for his fruit for the week and my veggies...

But the State Fair is in town, and I would really like to go, for the non-fried entertainment, of course.  I thought about this and realized I really don't want to be around all that crap, and not just the fried shit listed above, but that food centric environment.

This leads me to my question-where can you possibly go for entertainment, that does not have eating as a large part of the enjoyment?  

For example we loved to go to the movies, and never ate the popcorn or candy, but now that I am going without, I don't want to be around that stuff just yet.  

I know my limits and smelling that stuff would initiate my inner dog and I'd go all Pavlovian, like I've posted about before, drooling on the teenie boppers making out in front of me.

So other than an empty, wide open grass field, which is ok for a group of people or fornicating adults, where else is there to go on the weekend for enjoyment that isn't a food-focused atmosphere? 

 Food seems to follow me, so I need to distance myself from it and learn how to have fun without involving food.  Ok, that sounded bad, but you know what I mean, if you get your mind out of the gutter.

Food-free fun ideas for hubby and me to get out of the house?  Do Tell!!!

You're My Perspiration!!!

OK, part two...  
Alan's comment made me think about guys not having role models.  

Well, I'm not sure if that is completely true.  I have watched movies with my man and when said ripped actor appears semi-nude, he always looks at me like, "Could we have picked a movie with a less muscular star?  Or maybe one who keeps their shirt on and doesn't make me feel bad about my non-rippage?"

Or maybe that is just my interpretation of it...

Maybe he is really thinking, "Wipe that drool off your chin."

So I decided to come up with a few, ahemm, healthy role models for guys...so as not to appear sexist of course.  These were definitely easier to choose, since I may keep, um, memory of them locked in my brain for, um...rainy days?? ;-)

Here they are-my thinspiraton-or rather, those I would perspire my chunky ass on a treadmill for 5 hours for...
Hugh Jacked-man, as I affectionately call him-when we are getting caught in the rain with our Pina Coladas

So this saucy Aussie tops my list...he keeps himself in great shape, he is comfortable with his masculinity (think boy from Oz), he can SING, is the consummate good father, and loves his normal, down to earth wife.  This star might spur me to do PULLUPS.  A definite 5-star role model...

Clive don't-judge-my-acting-by-my-beauty-Owen

This guy can act.  And honestly I don't care if he never changes his accent for a role.  Love it-he could read me the phonebook, anytime he likes of course.  So many good roles I wouldn't know where to start...probably with his baby blues-oh but I digress...;-)  Stays at a healthy weight, fit and clean-take a cue Brad Pitt!

Johnny French Depp-get it?  Au Jus anyone??
So he smokes, drinks, is a bit thin, sometimes shaves, sometimes doesn't, chose a French chickie...hmm, why did I put him in here-he's no role model!  I just can't seem to remember why I included him...Hmm...

Cast of 300-that's 3600 abdominals people!!!

So I was just going to pick Gerard Butler, but why play favorites.  This is my homage to the healthiest cast of actor a movie has ever seen...sure Gerard dips his wick in all the wells he can find, but gotta love him.  And I don't give one big brown crap that their abs were 'enhanced' by airbrushing the edges...if I'm half naked for a whole damn movie I would expect to be sprayed within an inch of perfection, too! 

Sorry folks, I just cannot add Matthew McConaughy, as much as A Time to Kill makes me want to...I suspect recreational herbage there, not exactly the pillar of health I fear...

And my second husband...

Capt. Derek Jeter
Polite, well-spoken, loves his family, leadership, motivation, decent job...he's got it all folks. Except the perfect wife-I'm coming Derek! ;-)

Wednesday, September 29, 2010

You're the Meaning in My Life...

You're the Inspiration!  Ok, sorry to borrow from Chicago, especially since this idea came to me on the shitter.

So I am reading a magazine (don't even pretend like you don't read in the john) and I flip it over and there is Jennifer Aniston in a SmartWater ad-have you seen this?.  Now, I like this gal, and let's face it-this bitch looks fieeeeeerce.

But this is why I like her, she has never been in the media for being too skinny, in fact I remember when she started friends, people were on her for being too thick...seriously?

But I also like her because she doesn't pretend to NOT work out or diet-'teehee I just chase after my kids and the weight just falls off'.  Ugh that drives me batty.  So Miss Aniston is my 'health inspiration'.

Another of mine...let's see I'm not a big fan of most of her work, but everything I have heard about her states she eats pretty well, works out like a major hoss, and she NEVER makes apologies for her curvy figure.

I think I might be naked all the time if I had a figure like hers.  I mean seriously, this is sick (sick in the good way, people).

Someone I admire in a big way, probably because when I am my fittest, my figure resembled hers, and she also doesn't make apologies for not being 120 pounds, and obviously she is very healthy-Miss Serena...

Minus the belly ring-ouch!  Oooh, I do like her bathing suit now that I notice it!!!

And my favorite health role model, probably because her weight has fluctuated a bit like a normal person, and she is curvy, a hardworker, and a straight shooter.  I dig this chick...if I could be anyone, it would be the kickass Miss Winslet.  Go get you another Oscar, Girl!!!

But after this journey, I plan to be my own role model...

So who inspires you?  And I don't mean spiritually or mentally, and not someone you work out for (like yourself or your family)-but to work out, and to be a healthier, normal weight?  (And it cannot be Oprah Winfrey-anyone who ate fried butter cannot be mentioned in this blog)

On that note, a week or so ago, the Divine Miss B gave me an award...love her!

So rules are I have to say if I could go back and change one thing, would I and what would it be?

I would tell that coach to shove my extra 15 pounds up his fat, pervy, old, wrinkled and pasty a-hole.  Not that I have direct knowledge of his anus...

And I must also pass this on to 6 blogs-in no particular order...

Wishing you all an inspired Thursday!  Nite Nite.

There once was a chunky lass...

There once was a chunky lass
Who had a quite jiggly ass
She longed for some lean
Like during her teens
So desserts she decided to pass.

This mission was nothing but hard
Like cooking without any lard
So grill she did try
The burnt foods made her cry
But hubby ate and wasn't a bastard

No cheese was allowed on this plan
Though veggies were not in the ban
She so longed for cheddar
To make her feel better
But rather became a salad fan

So long is the row she must hoe
To become a healthy skinny doe
Towards losing her tub
Until her thighs don't rub
So the road less traveled she will go.

Love me some Robert Frost!
Have a good night...

Tuesday, September 28, 2010

Graphic Times call for Graphic Measures

Unlike other basic (laboratory) scientists, my training also consists of a part of curriculum dedicated to clinical sciences and patient care alongside medical doctors.  During this I have been fortunate enough to not only see lab science progress into patient therapies, but also examine patient trends and work backward to lab science to develop treatment.  So this post is throwback lesson of a little math plus medicine...just to remind you...

Today I read alot of blogs (ALOT) and many of them were posts of despair and frustration over cheating or not wanting to exercise and the scale not moving, and let's face it-we have ALL been there-in the dumps.

So since we are a visual society, I am going to use graphic representation to make my graphic point-you may forget my words, but you won't forget these pictures-consider yourself warned...


diabetic foot ulcer-often leading to complete amputations

Can you see what is COATING that bottom heart?
It's exactly what's clogging the inside.

Stroked-Out Brain

Breast Cancer

You think that top liver can clean your blood?

Colon Cancer
Colon cancer survivor...who will help you change yours?

So the next time you are thinking about going to the fridge or skipping a workout, let's all remember this math lesson...these are the RULES not the EXCEPTIONS.

When goals become G-O-A-L-S

OK, so obviously math ain't my thang...you'd never know that I have to use it everyday.

Here were the Hot 100 goals that I posted a while back:

My goals:
1.  161 pounds by year end-59 more to go
2.  No weeks with a weight gain
3.  No days eating over 2000 calories during the holidays

So ~60 pounds in 3 months=20 pounds per month.  So far the most I have lost in a month is 18 in my first month, ever since it has been 3 pounds per week.  And eating about 1000 calories a day leaves little wiggle room to ramp up exercise without my body eating my muscle.

Um, can you say backpeddling??

So I may have reached a little TOO high when I wrote #1.  However I have upheld #2 and #3 so far, but I guess Halloween will be the first big seasonal challenge of the big HOLIDAY SEASON.

This brings me to my question.  When does a goal become less about reality and more about fantasy?  Sure until a goal is actually reached, and I would argue that it must be held onto and maintained as well to qualify as 'reached', a goal is merely a fantasy.  Like an oasis on the horizon, there may be water, but I'm not quite there yet to know for sure.

However I have struggled for many years in setting goals for myself.  Early in my youth I started setting goals either extremely high or completely unreachable (such as, ehem...marrying Derek Jeter).

The problem is that some of these goals actually came to fruition, when they probably should not have.  I should say that they came to fruition probably due to 70% luck and 30% hard work.  This has propagated me setting high goals for my whole life so far...

But when setting a goal that will require 100% hard work by you and you alone, such as weight loss, is it better to set many dispersed mini goals that can be attained, in order to spawn more motivation to finish the journey? 

Should we not just aim to be slightly under an 'overweight' BMI, but in the middle to lower end of the 'ideal' range?

Is setting more difficult goals setting ourselves up for failure, or are they necessary to avoid 'near goal' slips and complacency around the upper 'ideal' border with 'overweight'? 

So how do you set your goals?  Do you set many that are easily attainable and reaching them keeps you motivated along the way without dispair of a far reaching goal on the horizon?  Or do you strive towards ONE?  Or you dream big like me and set a monster G-O-A-L (weight in an impossible time frame)?

By nature of the word itself, goals are to be strived towards and made, but how far is too far which may make us forget why we started to begin with?

Where does an impossible dream begin and a goal end?

Monday, September 27, 2010

Boring Post

Sorry for the lack of inspiration, I'm TIRED...here is my dinner.

4 oz of chicken sausage with italian spices
1 oz of fat free Presidente feta cheese
1 cup iceberg (not shown)
5 grape tomatoes
1 tbsp olive oil
2 tbsp balsalmic vinegar

On another note, when hubby came home, he called me because the neighbor's dog was in our driveway.  This is probably the fifth time my husband has come upon their dog wandering the neighborhood at all hours of the night.  His owners leave him in their fenced front yard during nice weather-all day and night.  And he gets out of a gate that they do not completely close.  Whenever we find this dog, he is SO happy to see us, and is SO starved for attention.  I feel like leaving them a note that if they aren't going to latch their damn gate and don't want him, that I will take him.  Ugh, freaking careless.  Such a sweet dog.

Anyway that is all-sorry for the boring post, but I did warn you! ;-)

Trick or Treat

One of my favorite habits that Polar used to have was coming to the back porch door, and sticking his giant head inside...he would stay there, so that we could not close the door, until he received a doggie biscuit.  Really anything edible would do.  We used to say, "Oh here comes Polar to trick or treat!"

This brings me to my point...and so begins the season of CANDY, CANDY, and more cellulite-inducing CRAP.  

It all starts with Halloween, and I KNOW you have all seen the myriad of black and orange specially wrapped candy in its OWN AISLE of the g-store.  Another reason I love/hate Whore Foods, no Hallo crap!

This 'fun' holiday, that I seem to vaguely remember stems from something to do with All Hallows Eve but I don't know a damn thing beyond that, is INFESTED with do-gooders trying to ply you everywhere you turn with CANDY.

You go to work, and sweet skinny people leave little chocolate morsels of heaven on your desk.  Oh and did I mention that they are click-clacking desk to desk in 7 inch heels and a vinyl Catwoman suit-plus a whip.  This is my nightmare...

And Horrorween is just the beginning of a psychotic holiday season where distant family members come to your house hell-bent on destroying your weight loss.  Ok, so again-this is my little nightmare.  I'm sure they actually want to spend family time together, too, but honestly to me holiday=good food since I gave food the power to make me fat.

So this year, I vow not to let the Horrorday Season spoil my Hot 100 plans and derail my weight loss.

This all starts with Horrorween-so how do I resist the Reesus demons-the cup I once deemed once of the human race's best inventions?  So maybe if I vow not to touch it then I won't be able to unwrap it, right? ;-)  There has to be an easier way other than hibernation until January...

What will you do to stay on plan?

Sunday, September 26, 2010

Shake Your Tailfeather

So my foray into iTunes hell today made me want to add more songs to MY iPod.  But I specifically need to add booty-movers to my exercise playlist.

In the honor of that, I was wondering if you could all tell me what songs make you pick up your pace during a workout, or even want to move in the first place.  I'll list a few of mine to motivate you all...but I really like all music!  Looking forward to hearing your input!

Bad Romance-Lady Gaga
Maneater-Nelly Furtado
Mr. Brightside-The Killers

And a little nightly inspiration for your sweet dreams...Nobody makes sleep look better than Ms. Pearl!

Dog Day Afternoon

So I am watching Nana Banana, so my Mom and Dad can escape for a 'mental healthy day' (the casino).  Everything is sunnier after Texas Hold 'Em apparently.

So Nana has behaved, but tried to con me into getting Chinese food for us for dinner.  I tried to explain that I am on a diet.  She tried to tell me why I need to keep some weight on me to be healthy.  Um, hello?  Have you seen my ass lately?  That weight ain't coming off without some C4 and a spark.

This is the same woman who has loggaria (diarrhea of the mouth) and speaks before thinking-this isn't just a geriatric habit-she's been doing it for years.  I remember walking in on my Mom crying one day because my grandmother told her she was so fat she looked pregnant.  My Mom is 175 pounds.  Not an oompa loompa, mind you.

So I bring Nana back to earth and crush her wild dinner hopes.  Nice try, Granny, but it is good old chicken breast, carrots, and sweet potato for you.  She says it is boring.  I am so close to snapping at her that she doesn't KNOW what a boring diet is...damn old people. ;-)

Also spent some quality time with the doggies.  It's a nice day out, so Pearl was able to hang out all day.  She is quite the sunbather, and likes to guard the house from people walking like a half mile away.

That crazy ear is cute as hell, but doesn't work.  This is my blind and deaf girl.  I know it is hard to tell her apart from her bro, Polar.  She is the best damn watchdog I have ever had.  Seriously.  And she sounds like a junkyard dog when she lets her barks rip.  Scary stuff.  But what a mushball.  Love her to pieces.

I can tell she misses Polar, but she is pretty independent and likes the other dogs just fine.  Except Sadie, our little beast from the east-I think Pearl wants her on a cracker with some Brie.

Another funny thing...I got my parents Apple Shuffle's for Christmas last year, along with gift certificates to iTunes.  So I set it all up for them, but my Dad has been asking for months if I would come add more songs to his shuffle.  

He figures he would bring me his computer and since I have nothing else to do, I could put some songs on it for him for when he is working out at the gym.  I don't mind doing this, and definitely encourage him to work out.  So I get his list...

Um, yeah, it's long.  What is worse is that there are several songs such as 'To Sir with Love', that had a ? following it, then 'British?'  So as I am scrolling through the 50 or so versions of that song, I think, which one of these artists is British?  Dude...  Not to mention the old French songs, that are misspelled without artists mentioned...  I don't do French.

So this has also been a music history lesson.  Ah, computer illiterate parents, gotta love 'em.  I know I do!

Saturday, September 25, 2010

Living in SchadenfreudeLand

I consider myself a good person, and honestly who doesn't?  But I'm feeling a bit devilish as...

Took this on our TV just a little while ago, can you see that score?????

Now seriously folks, this guy's puppy didn't just get eaten by accident, he didn't just realize that his baby really IS ugly, his kidneys didn't cease to function...  His freaking beloved TEXAS LONGHORNS were about to lose.  Which they ended up doing in GRAND fashion.

I am so sick of hearing how fantastic Texas is, how Mack Brown is the second coming, how they saved the Big 12, blah freaking blah blah blah.

No more title hopes for you, LONGHORNS!  Mwaaaaa Ha-Haaaaa.

Ok, I'm done being a competitive infant for now...

But this brings me to my REAL question...do weight loss bloggers revel in a little schadenfreude?  Sure some bloggers want you to believe that we are one big happy family working towards a common goal, which most of us probably are...

However, even in families there are those you don't necessarily care for or are competitive with...Right?  Admit it!
How do you think Nicky Hilton REALLY felt?

 And there are those that you relish in seeing fail...maybe because they are overpaid and underworked, or just idiotic collections of genes...

So sure we don't *like* to see people gain, and I am guessing NO ONE will admit to thinking "YESSSS!" when someone who has been cheating off plan non stop has a gain one week.  

BUT, when people gain or have bad weeks on the scale, does it in fact make us feel a bit better?  Like we are not being passed up-like we are still in the race?

Be honest-do other's bad scale days make us feel better about our own weight loss?  And if so, is this such a bad thing?  Does this revoke our 'good person' tag?

Or is this part of the support part of weight loss blogging-believing that the journey sucks for everyone and knowing everyone has bad days?  So maybe all the support isn't having well wishes given, but in knowing everyone is human and bound to fail sometime?

Or is this only hurting our own loss by focusing on other's success/failure?

Just curious...