Polar Bear

Polar Bear
My Boy

Friday, September 17, 2010

Vampires and Bathing Beauties

Ok, so I may have lured you here by false pretenses, because he
will not be on here.

Or MUCH better yet, not even this hunk of undead ass...

No, this is the toothy vampire bitch you'll get-

Not quite as sexy, but infinitely cuter.

This brings me to my point-when I was skinnier, about 4 years ago, I loved being in pictures.  

This is me at a size 8-10, freezing to death in Alaska.

Now I am the undead-shying away from mirrors but more importantly pictures...ducking behind pews at weddings, hiding behind large children in family photos.  At my brother in laws wedding, they had the slide show that included a bunch of pics of them together in different places, and I thought if I die tomorrow-how will my husband ever remember what I look like enough to never date anyone again in reverence of my eternal beauty???

I felt totally pathetic.  I cannot wait to feel confident enough to not request the power of veto before my family posts pictures on their facebook pages or sends pics with updates at Christmas.

Furthermore, you won't catch me near water-unlike this bathing beauty here...notice her 'bedroom eyes'-

You also will not catch me near as naked as her while swimming-shorts and t-shirt in all aqueous bodies, nor will I look as sexy as this brown beast-I've lost my come-hither look I fear.  Ha

What have you shied away from since you've been overweight?


Karla said...

Dresses, pants, dinner engagements, pictures, dates with the hubby, special time with the hubby, any kind of social engagement, I am now trying to get all that back, soo many wasted years, ah ... So I am a slow learner

Polar's Mom said...

Me, too, to all that you said. I found I would be super critical of people in my head to buffer myself in advance for them not liking me because I was fat. Never had anything to do with me being brusque and critical and cynical, I'm sure. I was totally mentally twisting myself into a bridge troll.

Polar's Mom

Bethanny said...

Bathing suits, strappy ANYTHING, shorts, short sleeves, pools, beaches, public events, reunions, parties... OMG I am a DUD a FAT DUD.
I squinted so hard trying to see your face. You are so pretty, I think. LOL Just kidding!

Polar's Mom said...

Smart ass. I had a closeup from this trip, but my skin was rebelling so I chose not to give those zits their 15 minutes of fame.

Of course I'm GAW-GEOUS. Duh. ;-)

Lala said...

Laughing me arse off! Bedroom eyes is the best shot ever! I avoid a lot. So much that I can't list it here. I may have to turn it into a blog post or something. But, I will say, the thing that pains me the most of the things I avoid is that I try not to get on an airplane out of the sheer terror that I'll be humiliated because I'll have to buy two seats. I don't know if I am that fat yet, but I think it's close and I don't dare find out. This means I don't get to see my awesome fam. as much as I should, and I have a growing niece and nephew who are about to forget who their aunt is. Kinda bites (to go with your theme).

Polar's Mom said...

Lala-I think that would be a great post! And I know what you mean about airplane seats. For years I kept loudly proclaiming how those damn seats were getting smaller, when my ass was just getting bigger. Ugh. So will that be your reward to yourself wen you reach goal? Go see your family?